Praise You

Can't be busier lately. This lifestyle reminds me of my uni days, when I worked on my assignments at the last minute and challenged myself under great stress. The only difference is that I have "assignments" due everyday now, and I'm really stretched to meet those deadlines. Even I'm well trained to cope with stress, I feel breathless from time to time.

Praise God that whenever I feel exhausted, He fills me with His strength, so that I can carry on. Everything that I'm devoting myself to is not for any monetary reward (simply because I'm not getting paid in anything I do & I'm quite happy doing it without being paid), but a dedication and a commitment to Him. He did hear my prayer, and now the doors are opened for me.

If there's one thing that I wanna break through this year, it will be to exercise my talents and gifts in event management for His sake. As I look back, I can clearly see His hand move in my life and ordain me in this field.

He opened the way for me to come and study in Australia by blocking my plan to study in the UK and softening my dad's heart;
He changed my major miraculously from Hospitality Management into Event Management;
He sowed the seed of passion into my heart in the field of events;
He gifted me with the creativity and the organizational skills needed...

I failed to see all these, saying nothing of asking why they happened and searching for an answer. I was blinded by my pride, and felt very reluctant to exercise my gifts for His kingdom. I was too occupied by my own plan for my life, and failed to ask what His plan for me is.

However, when He wants to teach, no one can say no to Him. And His teaching began... It was not by my choice, but His, that I was placed in the total darkness to look for a direction for my future. Firstly, He laid a question in my heart, and I started to look back and see how I am who I am. I love to ask questions, especially WHY, and I was surprised to find that I never asked myself WHY I am who I am. My shepherds always tell me to ask His will and plan for my future, instead of deciding it myself. I did ask, but did not hear anything from Him, or rather I was too impatient and proud to wait for His answer.

It was when I was placed in the total darkness that I began to pay more and more attention to His voice and guidance. It was in the total darkness that I learned what “walk by faith” really meant to me. What can I say? Hmm, that was tough, but I praise God for it.

It was in one desperate cry out to Him that He finally allowed me to have a glimpse of my future. Wow, I could hardly describe how I felt at that moment: I was extremely peaceful, for I know that my future is so secure in His hand (I knew that He has good plans for each and every one of His children, but when He actually shows you His plan, the sense of security will be so strong!); I was very thankful and excited, for I love to do what I’m to do and He knows what my passion is; I was stressed as well, because I could feel the expectations, and I knew the road ahead was not rosy, but a tough one.

I guess what impressed and moved me the most was the vision I saw after I had a glimpse into my future. When I was in the total darkness, I always asked for a light, so that I would see where I was and know where I would be heading to. In the vision, I saw the light and it was from within my body! I became semi-transparent and the light was shining within my body! I asked God what it meant, and here comes the answer: You were given the Holy Spirit, but you never take enough heed to it. Don’t search for the light from outside. I’m a God who loves to give surprises, and this time, your light will come from within. Listen to the Holy Spirit, and you’ll find the way out… “Awesome” is the only word I could utter…

I would say that I am still striving to walk out of the darkness, and I acknowledge that the road ahead is really tough and I will be challenged to the limit. I’m gonna take my first step according to what I was told, to be honest, with great fear and trembling in my heart. Please forgive me that I don’t wanna share the details here right now, but I will definitely do it in a due time. Truly hope and pray this would be part of an awesome testimony by the end of this year!

Psalms

"Life often seems to be out of control, and yet all events and situations are understood in the light of divine providence as being right on course according to God's timetable. Assuring glimpses of a future 'God's day' bolsters the call for perseverance to the end."

Reading "The Book of Praises" -^0^-

Gals Night Out

Ivy and her sheep went out for dinner tonight.

Look at my dear shepherd~ she looks young forever

(The saying is true: appearance is deceiving!)

Here comes some of the great food!

(Volcano Satay Chicken + Rice Vermicelli + Volcano Combination)

BIG ANNOUNCEMENT

Ivy is looking for a Pastor-to-be to be her boyfriend/husband.

It'll be great that the candidate(s) is not interested in going for missions in Middle East (woohoohoo~).

If you happen to fall into this category, or you know someone does, please contact Ivy ASAP!

(Oops, don't tell her that I revealled the secret, if it is. She's shy~)

Ezekiel 16

I am reading Ezekiel these days. One of the largely quoted sections will definitely be Ezekiel 15 The Outcast Vine.

However, if I am to choose a chapter which impressed me the most, it'll be Ezekiel 16, in which a sad story of Israel's sin and unfaithfulness to the love of God was unfolded. Unlike other chapters where Israel's sinful deeds, as facts, are revealed and reproached, this chapter dates back to the very beginning of a sad love story, revealing the very cause of God's deep sorrow and anger upon His lover. It's a story being narrated by Him. I was so touched by what I read, and can truly feel the pain and sorrow in His heart.

If you haven't read it, I do encourage you to read it NOW!
If you have come across it but didn't pay much attention, I will encourage you to read it AGAIN!

It's a great chapter to read, which allows you to have a glimpse of His heart. Strongly recommended!

The Vision of Teeth

I had a very interesting vision of teeth when I was about to sleep. I was quite touched, for I knew that it was God who placed it in my heart, telling me that He knew it all...

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In the vision, I saw a deciduous tooth, which was loose and a bit decayed. I could have left it there and waited till it was naturally replaced by the permanent tooth. However, I chose to go to the dentist and have it extracted.

I couldn't feel the pain, for I didn't know when the dentist took it out.
I should have felt released, for the decayed tooth was no longer there;
I should have felt excited, for I knew that there would erupt a brand-new permanent tooth.
And yet when I looked into the mirror and saw the hole in my mouth, it was the feeling of emptiness flooding in my heart.
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This reminded me of a prayer that I dedicated to Him not long ago. I prayed that He would take away some things and some people, which and whom I found it hard to let go because I cherished them so much. I knew what I did was wrong in His sight, and yet I did them again and again due to my own iniquity and a selfish heart.

I didn't expect Him to react so swiftly; I didn't know what He did, and how He did it; but it happened. He heard what I prayed, and took them away from me.

I should have felt released, for my sinful desires are not there;
I should have felt excited, for I know that my soul is gonna be replaced by something new and better.
However, it is the period of time when the deciduous tooth was extracted and the permanent tooth is yet to erupt that suffocates me. There is an emptiness in those transient moments.

I hope and pray that I would be like a child with the expectation of hoping to find something new erupting everyday when I look into the mirror and look into the empty space.

I know that I made the right decision;
I know that I would not regret;
I know that I would look back with affirmation and appreciation in the future;
even though I cannot see it and feel it at this moment.

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I am blessed with many visions, which helped me have a better and deeper understanding of life. The reason I chose to share this one is that I believe I am not the only one who feels this way. For all of my dear friends, who are going through or are to go through a process of being rebuilt, I pray that this article can and will be an encouragement. God bless.

Be A Star to Shine in the Dark

When I was taught in the physics class that the light in the stars had travelled hundreds of thousands of light years before it reached the earth, I was amazed. Ever since then, I love to look at the stars in the heavens and appreciate their beauty, which is so distant and unapproachable. More importantly, I consider it a way for me to have a glimpse of the past. "The planets where the light came might not exist any more, but the light is still on its way to our planet, namely earth. How amazing is that!" I always thought.

Not long ago I was reminded of another fact of the stars through the song IN THE VALLEY, in which parts of the lyrics go like this:

In the daytime there are stars in the heavens

But they only shine at night

And the deeper that I go into darkness

The more I see their radiant light

I've been taking it for granted that sun is for the daytime, while stars and moon for the night. Till I listened to this song, I totally neglected the exsitence of the stars during the daytime, for the sunlight is far more brighter. However, I suddenly realize that they, all of them, are there in the heavens 24/7. In the daytime, the sunlight is so strong that the light of the stars can barely been seen. Yet it is when the curtain of night is pulled down, I come to appreicate the radiant light of the stars.

This reminds me of different seasons in life and in my walk with Him. When the daytime comes, I feel warm and blessed. But the strong sunlight may blind my eyes from time to time, and I begin to take things for granted. However, it is the very time when the night visits that the stars shine. It is the very time when I have to walk in the dark that my eyes are open wide and start to see the unseen.

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Walking in the dark is of little fun, yet full of dangers. And yet I know if there were only daytimes in my life, I would have missed out a lot of wonderful things in life, which could only be seen at night. Therefore, I thank God for the nights and the darkness that I have to walk through. Whenever I look up and look at the stars, I know He is there watching over me.

So let me learn that my losses are my gain

To be broken is to heal

That the valley's where Your power is revealed

Finally

Finally set up a special blog for my special world - J1~

Here I come!